Down The Line

She’s amazing. Truly. She’s the funniest human being who’s ever lived. She’s the most beautiful woman in the history of women, and sometimes she purrs when she’s asleep.

Today is my first anniversary with Miss Annie Player, and I couldn’t possibly be happier about that then I am. Something like two and a half years ago, I received a tweet. It asked me if I’d be interested in going to a meeting of erotic artists. I’d only been living in London for a couple of months, and I was excited and flattered to be invited. The tweet was from Annie Player, and it changed the course of my life forever.

I never expected to be with her, and yet, today, I’m writing this while she paints her fingernails on the sofa to my right. We’re a couple; we’re friends, partners. We didn’t plan it or predict it; that first day I met her, in the Spice Of Life in Soho, she was the best-looking woman at the table. She was the best-looking woman in the pub, and I could only barely make eye contact because I fancied her so much. Now, I get to put my head down next to hers every night, and wake up with with her every morning.

Annie, I love you completely, and I can’t wait for this day to roll around next year, because it will mean I’ve had another year with you, my favourite person. It will mean that for another 365 days I can sniff your hair when you’re not looking, and I can write about how much I love you while you paint your fingernails. I don’t think you know how much you’ve changed my life, how much you’ve fixed me, how far I’ve come because of you, and how important you are to me. You are the most brilliant person I’ve ever met, and I’m so proud to be with you.

Hey look, here’s us…